her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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