I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
