her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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