It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
