Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
