New game: find the sober person in Tbell
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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