You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
areolas are like halos for boobs.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
