told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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