im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
so let's talk penis.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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