So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
