So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I have fence marks all over my body
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
