We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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