oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
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