just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
