Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
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