My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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