chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
