i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
