If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Randomize
