I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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