Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
We had to coat check the pizza.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
