I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
