I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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