My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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