i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
