I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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