I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
