So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
