We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
