Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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