hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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