Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
