What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize