Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
