If i come over, it means nothing
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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