when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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