Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
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