I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
