just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
So vagazzling was a success
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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