Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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