so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
