I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
