Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
