when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
