I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize