He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
