if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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