I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
