Small penises have feelings too.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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