Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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